Hold on, I have to get a few things...
Once upon a time there was a guy named Glen.
Glen was looking to change jobs.
So, he decided to build a website...
To showcase his mad code skills,
Offer testimonials from his peers,
Provide a link to his Resume,
And tell you how to contact him.
So Glen stayed up all night long.
Which made his wife angry.
And attracted lots of zombies.